People don’t invest in themselves.
And those who do, they focus on the ‘look’ factor so much!
At a time when the stress level is at its all-time high across the world and depression is spreading like an epidemic, it’s fascinating how less the attention is on our emotional well-being.
You aren’t emotionally strong. You know it.
You often cry at the drop of a dime. You are usually inconclusive in your interpersonal decisions. You don’t know how to effectively channelize your emotions positively. And oh, yes, even the minor setbacks send you into a frenzy of panic and disappointment.
Wouldn’t it be nice if you were slightly stronger emotionally than you are right now?
Think… handling breakups, family issues, losses, and failures would become so much easier!
While the change won’t exactly be radical and you won’t see the miraculous result in a week, there are certain practices that can make you emotionally stronger. Here’s what you need to do for that:
1. Come out of your comfort zone
You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore
You cannot become emotionally stronger unless and until you come across those emotions. And this is only possible when you’re open to do and experience things that are out of your comfort zone.
For example, if fear gets the most of you in social situations, you will resolve that problem only when you expose yourself in such situations.
So, pop out that ‘comfort bubble’ from around you. Do things that you are not conventionally comfortable doing. Smiling at the stranger, public speaking, saying “NO”, taking up newer projects, and so forth.
This is going to be extremely difficult for the introverts in particular. BUT it’s not an option. It’s essential that you get out of your comfort zone.
2. Surround yourself with positive people
You’re an average of the four-person you hang out the most.
If you’re surrounded by negative people who are emotionally wrecked, your conscious will eventually get influenced by that subconsciously.
On the other hand, if you’re hanging out with positive and energetic people, you will turn up exactly like them. Their positive energy will latch on to you, and you will feel much better emotionally. Your choice and decision-making will get improved. You will respond to different situations in a much constructive way.
So, take a look around you. What kind of people do you see? Are they optimistic or a pessimist? What do they (and you) talk most of the time? How do they respond to different things?
If you’re in a negative company, ditch such people. Find new friends and colleagues — people who are optimists. Over the course, this simple piece of advice will change your life.
3. Invest in your physical fitness
You’ve heard about this before. You know how exercising can change your life. In fact, you want to get physically fit (and aesthetically appealing). But you don’t do it! Ask why?
Working out has seamless benefits. When you exercise, your body releases a chemical called endorphins. These hormones improve our psychological function by positively affecting the brain and nervous system.
An increase in the number of endorphins in our body enhances our mood, minimizes our perception of pain and overall makes us feel good. This, along with the right diet, can make you much stronger and sensible emotionally.
Now, it’s okay that you don’t like going to the gym. You can pick other physical activities that you would like. For example, swimming, boxing, dancing, soccer, MMA, running, and more.
Your physical fitness will soon reflect on your emotional well-being.
4. Work on your weakness
What are the things you’re weak at? Create a list and then work on it.
A lot of our emotional conflicts arises from personal insecurity and vulnerability. The moment you fix these fundamental problems, you will find yourself much more emotionally stable.
So, try to find out things that you’re bad at and then work to improve. Scratch the surface. Do you have anger issues? Do you take too much of stress unnecessarily? Do you over-think? Do you say “yes” to everyone and for everything? Are you bad at making friends? Do you trust everyone blindly?
Identify the weaknesses and then improve.
5. Strengthen your strengths
While you should work on your weaknesses, your focus must primarily be on your strengths. Because you must always play your strength.
So, create a list of all the things that you’re good at. Don’t ignorantly say “I am good at nothing”. Take time to think.
It could be anything — from how nice you are to people to how much you enjoy working with the charities.
Are you good in mathematics? Do you write well? Can you sing well? Do you know how to play the piano?
Again, take time to think and then invest to strengthen your strengths.
6. Take up positive affirmations
Positive affirmations are underrated and under-estimated. However, in reality, they work like a magic in shaping you as an individual, if deployed consistently over a period of time.
So, pay attention to what kind of thoughts keep you busy throughout the day. (You will be surprised, in your head, how critical and harsh you are on yourself, often self-loathing!) Now, replace all these negative thoughts with the positive ones.
Take up a few positive affirmations and repeat them all day. Such seed thoughts would soon become your belief and you will start noticing positive changes in yourself.
Here are a few affirmations that you should go for:
“I am happy and content.”
“I am a good person.”
“I am working to succeed.”
“I am stronger.”
“I don’t care about others’ opinions.”
7. Define a few goals
Have a few goals that make you jump out of your bed every morning. Your goals, if very dear, can become your life purpose. And a life with purpose is no less than a blessing.
Besides, having a few goals gives you a psychological advantage. It’s much more constructive. And most importantly, by analyzing your progress towards those goals, you can easily identify the direction of your life; whether you’re heading in the right direction or not.
So, take out a piece of paper and write down all your short and long-term goals.
What do you want to achieve today? What goals do you have for the next month and year? How do you want to see 10-year future from today?
Have goals. And then work on them every day. It will give you a sense of purpose and achievement. And this will significantly be helpful emotionally.
Becoming emotionally stronger is not very easy. A lot also depends on the kind of family and culture you’re growing in. For example, if your parents are positive and confident individuals, you will get the same traits. But if they are negative people, and you have grown on not-so-humble society, it will have a bad influence on you.
Start by making this a commitment that you really (REALLY!) want to become emotionally stronger. And then devise a plan or lifestyle how you’re going to do that. Rest is simple. Spend all your remaining days working on that plan.